


The Eighth Day of Christmas

by Winklepicker



Series: 12 Days of Christmas [8]
Category: Crash Pad (2017), Logan Lucky (2017), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Clydeland, Crack, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, M/M, Smut, Tentacles, What the hell am I doing?, squid fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-28 07:41:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18205508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winklepicker/pseuds/Winklepicker
Summary: On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, a Stensland with squid arms all tentacl-y.Clyde keeps his SquidStens company during the full moon.





	The Eighth Day of Christmas

It took some getting used to. Clyde was never much of a swimmer, and the ocean was not a gentle place. But his Stens would never lead him into danger. And Clyde, well he would never leave Stensland to deal with his cycle alone.

They’d found a cave, tucked deep into the cliffs and sheltered by a small bay. Where Clyde was safe even at the highest tide and Stensland could splash about in the clear, green pool, the night water slapping a wet beat against the rocks. It was Stensland that found it. He’d drifted alone with the moon at its peak, his legs morphing into eight wriggling arms, and two dexterous paddled tentacles. 

“Come on. The water’s delightful,” said Stensland. From below the surface, a small jet of water landed squarely on Clyde’s chest.

“Hey!”

A cackle bounced off the rocky walls and Stensland shot down into the depths with barely a splash. His torso, pale as milk when he was calm, was an iridescent riot of colourful waves when excited. His other-worldly form zipped and danced beneath the ripples he’d left behind.

Crouched by the water’s edge, Clyde watched Stensland slow down and rise, orange and pink stripes chasing each other along his back and chest. His gold-red hair, darkened in the water to a dirty bronze, floated like rusted seaweed before he broke the surface.

“You got my book all wet,” Clyde pouted. He waved the sodden thing, sending droplets in a flying arc.

Stensland had the good sense to look ashamed for the better part of four seconds before he shot a hopeful lopsided smile at Clyde and said, “So, do _you_ wanna get all wet?” For good measure he batted his droplet-adorned lashes under tented brows. An unsportsmanlike move. Clyde had no chance. He glid to the steep rocky edge and hauled himself up to peck at the side of Clyde’s lips. “It’s awful boring and lonely down here.” Another bat of the eyelashes. “All alone. Just… swimming about.” An illegal pout. “Lonely.”

Clyde sat back on his heels. “Ain’t no doubt,” he shook his head while he took off his hand—it wouldn’t do to pickle it in brine. “You’ll be the death of me.”

“Yeah, but check it out.” Two tentacles wavered their way toward Clyde, they tickled up to his knees and pulled his legs open like a book. One plucked his prosthetic up and gently laid it down far from the edge, the other made a beeline for Clyde’s fly. “What a way to go, huh?”

Lovingly stripped, thoroughly fondled, and bobbingly hard, Clyde sat with his legs dangling in the water.

“I’ve got you.” Stensland reached his human arms out, ready to catch Clyde when he slipped into the pool. The pad of one long tentacle snaked around to suction onto Clyde’s bare back. A steadying gentle touch.

“I’ll never get used to this.” Clyde leant down, hooked his right arm around Stensland’s neck and pushed off the edge. They bobbed together as the the cool water settled. He shook his head, wanting to pluck Stensland’s lip from the cage of his teeth. “No. Not in a bad way.”

“It’s okay. I’m a freak, a monster. I get it.”

“Hey!” Clyde’s stern face was a good one. It brooked no argument, left no doubt of the seriousness of matters. It was not a look he directed at Stensland often but the effect was immediate. “I better not catch you talking about my boyfriend like that again.”

Stensland’s narrow shoulders hunched right up to his blushing ears. “Boyfriend,” he whispered. He fluttered his eyes closed and hugged Clyde tight. 

Clyde could feel the rippling excitement in the suckers at his back, the strong muscle of the tentacle pad. His legs were entwined with Stens’s eight arms, soft as clouds, strong as steel. They stroked and curled and tugged.

“Promise you won’t go calling yourself a freak again?” Clyde would not be swayed by Stensland’s wriggly ways. Except he would, he really would. But he wouldn’t. He would though.

Stensland huffed and rolled his eyes to the roof of the cave. “I guess so.” He pulled back to peck Clyde on the nose.

“That’s my boy,” Clyde leaned in for more, chasing Stensland’s lips while his red-haired sweetheart panted laughter and evaded capture. 

When Clyde gave in, Stensland swooped, marauding his mouth and tightening his grip, hands, tentacles, and all.

Safe in Stensland’s embrace, Clyde snaked his hand down, hooking his stump around Stensland’s neck instead. He found what he was looking for. Longer than the padded tentacle at his back. Plumper, thicker. He squeezed. “Well aren’t you a big boy,” he licked the words into Stensland’s mouth. Stensland swallowed them whole.

“It gets bigger,” he said, eyes earnest, eyebrows hopeful.

“Oh, I know it does honey-pie,” Clyde said. He stroked the smooth paddle, ran the tip of his finger around the edge of a sucker. It puckered and grasped.

“Oooh!” A shiver ran through Stensland. A green shimmer of light chased shining blue spots up and down his chest. “Let me put it in you. Please?” He writhed and bumped his chest against Clyde’s. “I need to put it in you,” he begged. “It’s gonna burst.” As if Clyde wouldn’t let him. As if Clyde wasn’t about to beg right back.

His legs were entirely engulfed in the midst of Stensland’s lower limbs. They roiled around him, hugging him tight and pulsing to a beat. One flexed and wriggled its way between his cheeks, teased at his hole. Another stretched out thin and made a rippling coil around his cock, its elongated end delved timidly around the head and slowly wriggled in.

“Don’t get all dainty on me, baby. Shove it in.” Is what Clyde wanted to say. He did his best, he really did. But what came out of his mouth while he was being milked like a prize heifer was a thin desperate keen against Stensland’s collarbone while he bucked against him. 

Stensland’s grunt was no more eloquent when he interpreted his boyfriend’s (boyfriend…his heart gave another happy squee) moans to mean, “Don’t get all dainty on me, baby. Shove it in.” So he did.

The little arm that had been tenderly exploring Clyde’s hole made a hasty retreat and saluted as the long white parade of Stensland’s penis snuggled in, paused a moment, and then began it’s long slow journey into the the warm snugness of Clyde. A thick ooze of slick eased its way.

They spun slowly together in the dark water. Clyde was enveloped, illuminated by the soft glowing colours shifting on Stensland’s skin. Purple and white stripes pulsed up and down his torso, their dancing rhythm matching the pace of the arm thrusting into Clyde, stroking him outside and in.

The echoes of their breathy gasps and the slaps of the water filled the cave, just as Stensland gave a final thrust and filled Clyde. And when the tentacle that had been sounding him slid out, he came as well, shooting into the squirming nest of Stensland’s fleshy arms.

They held each other tight until their ragged breaths slowed, Clyde spluttering a little after being pushed under in the throes of Stensland’s pleasure.

“Whew, that was exhausting. I need a nap.” Stensland nestled his head below Clyde’s chin and wrapped himself impossibly closer.

“Honey-pie? I need to get out.”

“Jus five minutes.”

“I ain’t got gills, baby.”

“Baby." Stens smiled and blinked his eyes closed. "You think our babies will look more like you or me?” He smushed into Clyde's neck.

“I’m getting a cramp.”

“I can’t wait to see you lay your eggs.”

“Eggs?”

“They’ll look so pretty and shiny and big sliding right out of you.”

“…”

“I’m getting kind of horny again just thinking about it.” Still snuggled against his chest, he gave a tentative nudge at Clyde’s arse.

“…”

"..."

"Eggs?"

**Author's Note:**

> I... I really don't know. I cannot explain anything that just happened here.  
> And believe me, the urge to go full absurd and have Stens change to squid upper and man lower was strong. It seemed a step too far. If you need to talk to someone about what happened, please come to the comments. We can commiserate and support each other. Together we are strong. Like Stensland's squid penis, which is as long as he is tall.


End file.
